Y**i
发帖数: 6922 | 1 LD转给我的,太搞笑了!
WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
Men Are Just Happier People --
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack...
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one
is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt..
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking
to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood at a time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
If someone forgets to invite you,
He or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25
minutes.
Men Are Just Happier People
NICKNAMES:
If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura
, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately
refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wild man.
EATING OUT:
When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20,even
though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and
none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, outcome the pocket calculators...YEP!!!
MONEY:
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS:
A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving
cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man
would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS:
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE:
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
MARRIAGE:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP:
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash,
answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
NATURAL:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING:
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about
dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret
fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
SO,(if you feel up to it) send this to the women who have a sense of humor
and who can handle it .....and to the men who will enjoy reading it. | J********o
发帖数: 17447 | | w*********g
发帖数: 10097 | 3 People never stare at your chest when you're talking
to them.
这是在BSO胸大吗？
【在 Y**i 的大作中提到】
: LD转给我的,太搞笑了!
: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
:
: Men Are Just Happier People --
:
: What do you expect from such simple creatures?
:
: Your last name stays put.
:
: The garage is all yours.
| g****t
发帖数: 2751 | 4 楼主有这个资格
【在 w*********g 的大作中提到】
: People never stare at your chest when you're talking
: to them.
: 这是在BSO胸大吗？
| a***e
发帖数: 27968 | 5 BSO you checked and confirmed?
【在 g****t 的大作中提到】
: 楼主有这个资格
| g****t
发帖数: 2751 | 6 哈哈， 当心大师用小三， 小六把你砸晕
【在 a***e 的大作中提到】
: BSO you checked and confirmed?
| d*******g
发帖数: 8992 | | t*****e
发帖数: 15794 | 8 貌似把女人抑郁小心眼的原因写了个遍
【在 Y**i 的大作中提到】
: LD转给我的,太搞笑了!
: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
:
: Men Are Just Happier People --
:
: What do you expect from such simple creatures?
:
: Your last name stays put.
:
: The garage is all yours.
|
|
