s**t 发帖数: 17016 | 1 snow melting and white isles
left on the lawn.
these interconnected isles are clouds
floating in the green sky.
it's a quiet and bright afternoon.
I am conceiving a poem,
leaf-shadows dancing on the remnant snow
as butterflies over clouds.
two hours later, I stop thinking
and look outside:
those clouds still there
not drift away. | s**t 发帖数: 17016 | 2 忍不住又写了一个
【在 s**t 的大作中提到】 : snow melting and white isles : left on the lawn. : these interconnected isles are clouds : floating in the green sky. : it's a quiet and bright afternoon. : I am conceiving a poem, : leaf-shadows dancing on the remnant snow : as butterflies over clouds. : two hours later, I stop thinking : and look outside:
| S*******t 发帖数: 3956 | | L****o 发帖数: 1642 | 4 前面很好,有奇妙的想象,最后一段弱了些,可以考虑怎么深入推进。
【在 s**t 的大作中提到】 : snow melting and white isles : left on the lawn. : these interconnected isles are clouds : floating in the green sky. : it's a quiet and bright afternoon. : I am conceiving a poem, : leaf-shadows dancing on the remnant snow : as butterflies over clouds. : two hours later, I stop thinking : and look outside:
| n*****r 发帖数: 2125 | |
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