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发帖数: 6571 | 1 Kurt Schlichter
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Posted: Aug 08, 2016 12:01 AM
Now, more than ever, people need, good solid conservative advice, especially
liberals, hipsters and social justice warriors. I am here to help!
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Dear Kurt: I’m at a mall in California and there’s a gentleman with a
rifle screaming “Allahu akbar!” and “I support ISIS! Do you hear me? ISIS
! I love ISIS!” I have no idea who he is or what his motive might be. I bet
he’s either a Tea Party Republican Christian or a Tea Party Republican
Christian NRA member.
I’m just glad that our wise legislature has ensured we cannot carry guns of
our own and make things worse by protecting ourselves as he fires at us
indiscriminately. One thing’s certain: he bought his fully automatic weapon
with 100 round clips through a gun show loophole without a background check
, which I understand is totally legal and happens all the time. We should
ban those.
Oh, and I’m also worried about a backlash of Islamophobia for … uh … no
particular reason. What should I do? Signed, Wondering What I Did To Make
Him So Mad At Us
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Dear Head Donor: If it makes you feel better, and I’m sure it will, this
really is all your fault. You absolutely caused this. No, not by trying to
bring civilization to the stinking cesspit that was his homeland – if you
had had your way, we would have left them to commit genocide on one another
undisturbed while you virtue signaled at us for not doing something about it
. No, you caused it by failing to submit and utterly surrender to your
radical Muslim overlords! If you had just been more accepting of other
cultures, you would have fully and unreservedly embraced his Salafist heresy
, stuck your girlfriend in a burka, and swore off maple syrup-flavored craft
beer forever. I suggest you go up to him right now and apologize.
http://townhall.com/columnists/kurtschlichter/2016/08/08/dear-kurt-what-should-i-do-i-think-the-guy-shooting-and-yelling-about-isis-is-a-tea-partier-n2202197 |
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