l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 1 【 以下文字转载自 Belief 讨论区 】
发信人: hitarii (一人), 信区: Belief
标 题: 主里弟兄姐妹们，请帮帮我(请勿置首页)
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Tue Sep 16 13:41:23 2008)
上大学时我接触过基督徒，觉得他们都很nice,跟我前夫谈恋爱那会儿，他问我要不
要受浸，我毫不犹豫地支持他去受浸。
5年前我也来到美国，不久就受浸了，那时虽然吵吵闹闹，在主里却是很快乐的。
后来由於他学业繁重，我工作繁忙，去教会的机会越来越少。由於缺少到主面前悔
改，他变得越来越自私，越来越猖狂, 晚上看A片，看到凌晨2，3点就到我身上乱摸，
弄得我总是睡不好觉，而且吵架起来动不动就打我。被他打了将近4年，终於有一天他
打我打得
很厉害，脖子差点被扭断，脸上伤了几处，现在还能看到伤痕，邻居报了警，警察
来拍了照，他被带走在监狱里呆了两天。
出来后他曾经承认要悔改，可是过一阵就故伎重演，看A片，2，3点才回床睡觉。我
知道在基督徒来说，丈夫妻子是一体，是不可以离婚的。 但是无法睡整夜觉，我身
体越来越差，我多次提出离婚，他坚决不同意。
后来我自暴自 | l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 2 看完非常痛心.
我建议你去找牧师私下谈, 如果你不希望把自己得事情都让教会的其他人知道的话.
只是不希望你把事情都憋在肚子里, 而当可能有机会得到建议和帮助的时候却又错过机
会.
另外, 必要时要强硬, 这个是一种侵犯了, 你要知道你必须使用法律武器来保护自己. | l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 3 为什么不让你吃Lord's Supper, 太奇怪了, 这个, 和你离婚不离婚是没有关系了, 也
不是罪不罪的问题, 你要说罪, 圣经里说我们每个人都是罪人. 教会, 当然是指好的,
正规的教会, 是不会这么把你拒之门外就因为离过婚, Lord's Supper是给每个虔诚的
基督徒的. 如果你是, 你就可以参加.
在基督徒中, 有这么个群体, 是离婚了, 种种原因, 其中不乏就是因为丈夫不是虔诚的
基督徒, 我也看到过又再婚的基督徒, 在主里终于找到适合的另一半, 幸福生活. 对于
这个, 是要给与祝福的.
同样也祝福你, 最终能找到你的幸福. | j*****I
发帖数: 2626 | 4 人心诡诈. 我对belief版的帖子的真实性持保留态度. 如果真的有负担,倒不如
直接联系当事人. 弟兄对弟兄,姐妹对姐妹.
【在 l*********e 的大作中提到】
: 看完非常痛心.
: 我建议你去找牧师私下谈, 如果你不希望把自己得事情都让教会的其他人知道的话.
: 只是不希望你把事情都憋在肚子里, 而当可能有机会得到建议和帮助的时候却又错过机
: 会.
: 另外, 必要时要强硬, 这个是一种侵犯了, 你要知道你必须使用法律武器来保护自己.
| t*******d
发帖数: 2570 | 5 苏东坡和佛印的故事说的好：心中有佛，看见什么都是佛，... (note: the following words were deleted as they are not respectful - travel33)
【在 j*****I 的大作中提到】
: 人心诡诈. 我对belief版的帖子的真实性持保留态度. 如果真的有负担,倒不如
: 直接联系当事人. 弟兄对弟兄,姐妹对姐妹.
| j*****I
发帖数: 2626 | 6 我信耶稣,不信佛
【在 t*******d 的大作中提到】
: 苏东坡和佛印的故事说的好：心中有佛，看见什么都是佛，... (note: the following words were deleted as they are not respectful - travel33)
| t******3
发帖数: 431 | 7 主从来没有叫人软弱, 其它宗教讲历来顺受， 但是基督教要求的是积极，向上的人生
观。
我很怀疑这篇文章的真实性。
【在 l*********e 的大作中提到】
: 为什么不让你吃Lord's Supper, 太奇怪了, 这个, 和你离婚不离婚是没有关系了, 也
: 不是罪不罪的问题, 你要说罪, 圣经里说我们每个人都是罪人. 教会, 当然是指好的,
: 正规的教会, 是不会这么把你拒之门外就因为离过婚, Lord's Supper是给每个虔诚的
: 基督徒的. 如果你是, 你就可以参加.
: 在基督徒中, 有这么个群体, 是离婚了, 种种原因, 其中不乏就是因为丈夫不是虔诚的
: 基督徒, 我也看到过又再婚的基督徒, 在主里终于找到适合的另一半, 幸福生活. 对于
: 这个, 是要给与祝福的.
: 同样也祝福你, 最终能找到你的幸福.
| y***y
发帖数: 4957 | 8 I can NOT agree!! This is called JUDGEMENT!!!
主从来没有叫人软弱, means our people will never "软弱"? and "软弱" poeple
are all lying??? I dont see any reasonable logic here.
For me, I will choose to believe her and help her. Dont want to take the
risk that if the story were true, your judgement will hurt an already hurt
sister. And for a Christian, hurt from inside of church is the most
devastating. I'd rather see that I am deceived and my love is abused, than
a sister being hurt by us. | y***y
发帖数: 4957 | 9 Maybe you can give him a warning now. Let him know that either he improve
himself that you 2 can be together or he leaves you alone without any
harassing.
if he doesnt follow: 1. "打算重新找一个住处" sounds like a good idea. also
change your cell phone so that he cannot find you. 2. Restraining Order
If there are anyone you can trust in the church, tell them the situation.
You definitely needs support from friends.
If convenient, can you let us know where you live? Also there is another
Christian forum
【在 l*********e 的大作中提到】
: 为什么不让你吃Lord's Supper, 太奇怪了, 这个, 和你离婚不离婚是没有关系了, 也
: 不是罪不罪的问题, 你要说罪, 圣经里说我们每个人都是罪人. 教会, 当然是指好的,
: 正规的教会, 是不会这么把你拒之门外就因为离过婚, Lord's Supper是给每个虔诚的
: 基督徒的. 如果你是, 你就可以参加.
: 在基督徒中, 有这么个群体, 是离婚了, 种种原因, 其中不乏就是因为丈夫不是虔诚的
: 基督徒, 我也看到过又再婚的基督徒, 在主里终于找到适合的另一半, 幸福生活. 对于
: 这个, 是要给与祝福的.
: 同样也祝福你, 最终能找到你的幸福.
| t*******d
发帖数: 2570 | 10 What would Jesus do if he sees this post? Is "this story is likely to be
fake" his first response? Aren't we suppose to follow his example? I cannot
imagine Jesus will turn away and say "I doubt this post is true."
As to advice to hitarri, God gives you the law system to use. I don't think
use the law system is something against the wish of the God. God also gives
you friends whether they are Christians or not, let them help you.
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: 主从来没有叫人软弱, 其它宗教讲历来顺受， 但是基督教要求的是积极，向上的人生
: 观。
: 我很怀疑这篇文章的真实性。
:
| | | j*****I
发帖数: 2626 | 11 全知全能的神知道网络上的东西哪些是真的哪些是假的,我不能.
belief版上攻击基督的多了去了,冒出一两个伪装基督徒挖坑的,一点也不奇怪.
如果真的很有负担,可以直接去联系人家,既辨别了真假,又为主做工.
cannot
think
gives
【在 t*******d 的大作中提到】
: What would Jesus do if he sees this post? Is "this story is likely to be
: fake" his first response? Aren't we suppose to follow his example? I cannot
: imagine Jesus will turn away and say "I doubt this post is true."
: As to advice to hitarri, God gives you the law system to use. I don't think
: use the law system is something against the wish of the God. God also gives
: you friends whether they are Christians or not, let them help you.
| y***y
发帖数: 4957 | 12 da jia shuohua zhu yi yuqi ba. The sister already joined our board. :)
Welcome! | g******s
发帖数: 3056 | 13 如果是真的基督徒怎么会在那种地方发帖子求救？ 无非就是想让别人看基督徒的笑话
而已。
嗤之以鼻。 | B**********y
发帖数: 3855 | 14 原贴在哪,没看到.
关于遭遇家暴/外遇的基督徒,要不要诉之法律,求助保护,甚至能不能主动要求离婚.以
前我在彩虹论坛上看到过很激烈的讨论.
有兄弟姐妹很严厉地对那位姐妹提出批评,一个个象法官一样的来搬圣经条文.
说没有依靠主,软弱;甚至他们的婚姻/配偶出现这种行为,也是当事人要负责任,要先向
神悔改.那位姐妹愿意等待先生回转,他们又说她的祷告不符合神的心意,因为她向神控
诉自己的丈夫.blahblah...当然也有做安慰和鼓励的,但是总而言之是:忍,忍,忍,退让,
退让...
当时,看得我是很想砸电脑了!!抱歉,我还是很血气的.
不知道上面的姐妹在哪个州,我知道纽约有个机构:励馨妇女儿童协助,专门负责处理家
暴和婚姻辅导.也许你附近的,美国的教会社团组织也有相似机构,他们可以安排临时住
所,心理辅导和法律处理.
如果你一时找不到,尽量搬去和教会姐妹或朋友住处去一段时间.你需要有属灵的同伴一
起和你祷告,一个你信任的,愿意敞开心扉的姐妹.牧师不见得一定是很好的寻求帮助的
对象,除非他有这方面事奉和辅导的经验.
教会里一点事情往往是流言飞语的焦点,你自己的隐私尽量和小范围里姐妹交流.
另外 | w******0
发帖数: 1404 | 15 May God's love dominates us. | y***y
发帖数: 4957 | 16 seems many poeple dont know there is a biblestudy board. And even they know,
they cannot post anything before becoming a member here.... If i am not
familiar with this bbs, i will think "belief" is a good place to post it too
. At least, there are some christians there.
【在 g******s 的大作中提到】
: 如果是真的基督徒怎么会在那种地方发帖子求救？ 无非就是想让别人看基督徒的笑话
: 而已。
: 嗤之以鼻。
| t******3
发帖数: 431 | 17 大圣教的？ 看你的签名。
【在 w******0 的大作中提到】
: May God's love dominates us.
| t******3
发帖数: 431 | 18 God would know if this is true beforehand.
cannot
think
gives
【在 t*******d 的大作中提到】
: What would Jesus do if he sees this post? Is "this story is likely to be
: fake" his first response? Aren't we suppose to follow his example? I cannot
: imagine Jesus will turn away and say "I doubt this post is true."
: As to advice to hitarri, God gives you the law system to use. I don't think
: use the law system is something against the wish of the God. God also gives
: you friends whether they are Christians or not, let them help you.
| t******3
发帖数: 431 | 19 "可是我信主，我是那样地软弱，几次忍无可忍打了911又去取消掉。"
- does this ring a bell to you? what's kind of relationship between 信主
and 那样地软弱? God wants her to 那样地软弱, and 打了911又去取消掉?
Both agreement and disagreemtn are called JUDGEMENT. Agreement is an agreed
judgement, disagreement is a disagreed judgement.
I question the story, but that does not mean I won't help such person if
that is true.
The whole story is: male Christian - porn - divorce.
Maybe you could contact her directly and see what we could help. no offense
【在 y***y 的大作中提到】
: I can NOT agree!! This is called JUDGEMENT!!!
: 主从来没有叫人软弱, means our people will never "软弱"? and "软弱" poeple
: are all lying??? I dont see any reasonable logic here.
: For me, I will choose to believe her and help her. Dont want to take the
: risk that if the story were true, your judgement will hurt an already hurt
: sister. And for a Christian, hurt from inside of church is the most
: devastating. I'd rather see that I am deceived and my love is abused, than
: a sister being hurt by us.
| w******0
发帖数: 1404 | 20 没人说大圣教的就不能来吧？只要不违反版规。
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: 大圣教的？ 看你的签名。
| | | t*******d
发帖数: 2570 | 21 I do not believe God loves you have anything to do with whether he knows you
deserve his love or not. If you think God loves you just because he knows
you are deserving before hand, then you just cheapen his love.
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: God would know if this is true beforehand.
:
: cannot
: think
: gives
| w******0
发帖数: 1404 | 22 但我们不知道。不知道就下断言很容易陷入论断。
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: God would know if this is true beforehand.
:
: cannot
: think
: gives
| w******0
发帖数: 1404 | 23 哎，论断这个字眼实在被abuse得太厉害了！
agreed
offense.
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: "可是我信主，我是那样地软弱，几次忍无可忍打了911又去取消掉。"
: - does this ring a bell to you? what's kind of relationship between 信主
: and 那样地软弱? God wants her to 那样地软弱, and 打了911又去取消掉?
: Both agreement and disagreemtn are called JUDGEMENT. Agreement is an agreed
: judgement, disagreement is a disagreed judgement.
: I question the story, but that does not mean I won't help such person if
: that is true.
: The whole story is: male Christian - porn - divorce.
: Maybe you could contact her directly and see what we could help. no offense
| w******0
发帖数: 1404 | 24 No one deserves God's love, no, not even one!
you
【在 t*******d 的大作中提到】
: I do not believe God loves you have anything to do with whether he knows you
: deserve his love or not. If you think God loves you just because he knows
: you are deserving before hand, then you just cheapen his love.
| t*******d
发帖数: 2570 | 25 Somehow we are seeing the same story so differently.
I see a person who happens to be a Christian is suffering and want help and
direction. And you see male Christian - porn - divorce. Care to reflect why
we see the same story so differently? No offense.
agreed
offense.
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: "可是我信主，我是那样地软弱，几次忍无可忍打了911又去取消掉。"
: - does this ring a bell to you? what's kind of relationship between 信主
: and 那样地软弱? God wants her to 那样地软弱, and 打了911又去取消掉?
: Both agreement and disagreemtn are called JUDGEMENT. Agreement is an agreed
: judgement, disagreement is a disagreed judgement.
: I question the story, but that does not mean I won't help such person if
: that is true.
: The whole story is: male Christian - porn - divorce.
: Maybe you could contact her directly and see what we could help. no offense
| w******0
发帖数: 1404 | 26 It seems sth. wrong.
and
why
【在 t*******d 的大作中提到】
: Somehow we are seeing the same story so differently.
: I see a person who happens to be a Christian is suffering and want help and
: direction. And you see male Christian - porn - divorce. Care to reflect why
: we see the same story so differently? No offense.
:
: agreed
: offense.
| y***y
发帖数: 4957 | 27 this actually sounds like "mercy" to me. I think she is a good hearted ex-
wife.
【在 t******3 的大作中提到】
: "可是我信主，我是那样地软弱，几次忍无可忍打了911又去取消掉。"
: - does this ring a bell to you? what's kind of relationship between 信主
: and 那样地软弱? God wants her to 那样地软弱, and 打了911又去取消掉?
: Both agreement and disagreemtn are called JUDGEMENT. Agreement is an agreed
: judgement, disagreement is a disagreed judgement.
: I question the story, but that does not mean I won't help such person if
: that is true.
: The whole story is: male Christian - porn - divorce.
: Maybe you could contact her directly and see what we could help. no offense
|
|
