a***8
发帖数: 4735 | 1 It is so weired that my nanny can drive me crazy. I 've read so many posts
about mom in law story, but me and my mom in law can get along so good.
There let me share my story of my nanny.
I have hired a nanny for about two years from now. She is a nice lady
taking good care of my baby and my baby loves her a lot, and she never touch
or moved anything valuable in our house. These are the reasons why we are
still hire her. However, my husband and my parents in law insist that my
daughter should learn new thing at her age, so we put my baby to a daycare
in a part time base and keep my nanny to clean the house and cook meals when
baby is in the daycare.
Everything works fine with my nanny beside she talks too much and loves to
change the way we live or giving opinions/comment of our lives. Sometime
what she said really upset me, she always compared me to her ex- master, her
ex master (I called her XX) is from the same Chinese city as we from. XX is
a very lucky women married a rich American man, stay at home and hired two
nannies to do take care of her kids, do housework and XX also never cook
anymeal for the family. However, in my nanny's mind XX is the best woman
ever,My nanny will say i am not as organize and smart as XX. I do agree i am
not a very organized person at home, and i told her since XX had nothing to
do of course she can be very organized. Here are the normal conversation
my nanny said to me 100 times already, by a daily base.
This conversation repeats almost everyday, she will say the same thing
everytime she open my freezer and says "XX (her ex master) is very organized
, she never have so many stuff in the freezer... XX know where she place her
stuff"
"Ever XX never cook, and never did any housework, but she is way organized
than you." (But XX never go to work, she has 24 hours to organize her
freezer!!)
There is the best one:
"You manner of walking and eating look kinder bad, XX's way of eating and
walking seems she is from a high class family"
"I can tell XX 's family must be well better than yours" (I never told my
nanny my family, but it seems XX's parents always told my nanny how high
class they are in China....
"XX never allow her daughter to play the cleaning games, since for her it is lower class people's job, are you ok for your daughter to help for cleaning?"
It is kind of drive me crazy, evertime she said this, i try to ignore her
and not response, but she will keep go on and on. due to finding a good nanny for my daugher is not easy.
What do you do in my shoes, do you tell her directly it is upsetting me for
what she says? Or, i should just ignore it, never care about it?
P.S. I have a full time job, sometime even need to do over time work, and i
cook meal in weekend, since my LG loves my style of cooking, he can't eat my
nanny's meal for the whole week | n****m
发帖数: 1283 | 2 What are you waiting for?
If you still want to keep her while put her on probation, cook several meals
for your husband and freeze them in the refrigerator. You then tell her the
reason that your husband does not like her cooking.
If she is not alerted, you know what to do. | r*z
发帖数: 1679 | 3 you seem to have communication problem with your nanny. have you ever
brought up this to her attention that you are upset about her comments?
tell her that your daughter, your family, you in particular, appreciate her
time and effort in the past two years taking care of the family. you'd love
to keep her forever (long time) as long as she also likes to stay.
and then, be honest with her that, she sometimes got on your never when she
disgraced you comparing to xx. tell her that you'd like to learn good things
from others, but you are yourself, you are not going to change overnight
for better. your family can live with your way. the last but not the least,
draw a line (make the rule) that she is not supposed to mention anything
about xx any more in the future. you can allow some repeats since she often
used to do that, but over time, she'd behave better. if the situation doesn'
t get any better, meaning that she's made her mind to quit. then, let it
happen.
touch
are
when
【在 a***8 的大作中提到】
: It is so weired that my nanny can drive me crazy. I 've read so many posts
: about mom in law story, but me and my mom in law can get along so good.
: There let me share my story of my nanny.
: I have hired a nanny for about two years from now. She is a nice lady
: taking good care of my baby and my baby loves her a lot, and she never touch
: or moved anything valuable in our house. These are the reasons why we are
: still hire her. However, my husband and my parents in law insist that my
: daughter should learn new thing at her age, so we put my baby to a daycare
: in a part time base and keep my nanny to clean the house and cook meals when
: baby is in the daycare.
| a***8
发帖数: 4735 | 4 Thanks for your reply and suggestions.
My LG has the same comments as yours, i need to tell her she should not
mention about XX anymore. But probably she will think i am just jealous of XX.
My plan is to hire the nanny until my baby reach 2 and half years old by
that time she can go to the day care full time. I do agree when you have a
nanny in home, it really affect your own privacy and your peace of mind. But
we need help since our parents are too busy to come over to help us.
her
love
she
things
,
【在 r*z 的大作中提到】
: you seem to have communication problem with your nanny. have you ever
: brought up this to her attention that you are upset about her comments?
: tell her that your daughter, your family, you in particular, appreciate her
: time and effort in the past two years taking care of the family. you'd love
: to keep her forever (long time) as long as she also likes to stay.
: and then, be honest with her that, she sometimes got on your never when she
: disgraced you comparing to xx. tell her that you'd like to learn good things
: from others, but you are yourself, you are not going to change overnight
: for better. your family can live with your way. the last but not the least,
: draw a line (make the rule) that she is not supposed to mention anything
| a***8
发帖数: 4735 | 5 Thanks,
My nanny always told me my cooking is too oily, fatty and salty, so i can't
change her way of cooking. And she only able to cook healthy style food, in
my LG's opinion it is bascially no taste at all, so i need to prepare food
for my LG's taste. I called my nanny's food as weight loss meal : )
meals
the
【在 n****m 的大作中提到】
: What are you waiting for?
: If you still want to keep her while put her on probation, cook several meals
: for your husband and freeze them in the refrigerator. You then tell her the
: reason that your husband does not like her cooking.
: If she is not alerted, you know what to do.
| D*****n
发帖数: 235 | 6 这个保姆很不会做人。容易挑起家庭矛盾。我觉得你可以开玩笑地告诉她，你被她的话
伤到了，很不开心，觉得自己被比较很不自在。看她怎么说。她会在意工作，适当住嘴
的。我觉得保姆有时让主人感觉不好自己心里会有一种莫名的平衡。比如说我保姆会告
诉我，我不如她的上一个雇主会过。另外一个保姆会吹嘘上一个雇主家境富有。我们左
耳听右耳出就是了。但是太过分了，也要提醒注意。
touch
are
when
【在 a***8 的大作中提到】
: It is so weired that my nanny can drive me crazy. I 've read so many posts
: about mom in law story, but me and my mom in law can get along so good.
: There let me share my story of my nanny.
: I have hired a nanny for about two years from now. She is a nice lady
: taking good care of my baby and my baby loves her a lot, and she never touch
: or moved anything valuable in our house. These are the reasons why we are
: still hire her. However, my husband and my parents in law insist that my
: daughter should learn new thing at her age, so we put my baby to a daycare
: in a part time base and keep my nanny to clean the house and cook meals when
: baby is in the daycare.
| a***8
发帖数: 4735 | 7 Hoho, we have the same experience.
re "容易挑起家庭矛盾", she do always mention why i can i have good relationship with my mom in law, and she told me sometime she heard when my mom in law's bad mouthing me. I just ignore and never care of what she said. Since nanny is for short period of time, and my mom in law is one of my close relative.
I don't know why those nannies will say something like that. Like we would
never tell our current employer how good the former boss is. But off course,
no bad mouthing of former boss either.
I do concern about my nanny told my LG how pretty and wonderful of her ex-
master XX is, but my LG said he never really takes my nanny's word seriously.
XX is the first family she worked when she came to the USA. After working for XX about a year, she worked for YY's family for two years, and she always told me how worst YY compared to XX. She was upset that YY laid off her and put her Baby to a daycare. I am understanding why YY did that, since YY can't handle my nanny keep compared her to XX for two years.
The reason of a nanny tells us her wealthy ex-master is ask for more money for her services. So i never mention about our income level like XX and her parents. My nanny said XX's parents own some Qing Dynasty Antique in China. Haha, what on earth an old couple want to impressive a nanny for? Wired.
【在 D*****n 的大作中提到】
: 这个保姆很不会做人。容易挑起家庭矛盾。我觉得你可以开玩笑地告诉她，你被她的话
: 伤到了，很不开心，觉得自己被比较很不自在。看她怎么说。她会在意工作，适当住嘴
: 的。我觉得保姆有时让主人感觉不好自己心里会有一种莫名的平衡。比如说我保姆会告
: 诉我，我不如她的上一个雇主会过。另外一个保姆会吹嘘上一个雇主家境富有。我们左
: 耳听右耳出就是了。但是太过分了，也要提醒注意。
:
: touch
: are
: when
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