m******t 发帖数: 184 | 1 孩子的的大夫是Tribeca, 他们有一本书叫The Bew Basics
刚看到一个部分是关于训练孩子睡眠的。
简单说
一般是从四个月开始,但他们发现其实从两个月开始更加有效。这时间训练孩子独立睡
眠只需要三天。
晚上喂饱孩子时候把孩子扔床上,然后离开不要再打搅孩子,第二天早上再来看孩子。
孩子大概第一天和第二天会哭的比较厉害,第三天第四天就没事了。
具体文章参见下面。因为我对这便不熟悉,觉得有点夸张。他们说的是否真的这么简单
有效。当然,我逻辑上同意他们的说法,越早训练,孩子依赖性越容易摆脱,有可能事
半功倍。但不知道大家看法如何?
The First Couple of Months
This period is your best opportunity to make your baby a night sleeper. Here
’s how.
After a couple of weeks, anna is sleeping more at night than during the day.
Each waking period ends with a feeding, and nursing is as much about
soothing as it is about nutrition. This is more pronounced in breast fed
children, thanks to the physical intimacy of nursing. As time goes on, you’
ve become more accustomed to anna’s temperament and needs, and she is
getting used to the fact that when she has a need you will tend to her.
In the first couple of months, I suggest that you not jump up at her
slightest peep and that you ignore her minor whining so she can soothe
herself back to sleep. That means letting her wiggle, fuss, or suck on her
fist for a while. If she manages to fall back to sleep without your help
even once, she’s learned the basis of self-soothing, and it will happen
more naturally the second time. Of course, if her requests become more
persistent, you’ll have to feed her.
You can practice this laissez-faire method even if you’re cosleeping [See:
Cosleeping]. While the average parent naturally reaches this point of
adjustment around two months after birth, others come to it earlier, and
some are still jumping up at every whim, long past the first birthday.
Wherever you stand is fine, as long as you understand the implications.
In observing family dynamics, I was puzzled as to why some babies would
sleep through the night and others wouldn’t. I learned that the parents who
were a little less responsive to late-night fussing always had kids who
were good sleepers, while the jumpy folks had kids who would wake up
repeatedly at night until it became unbearable. For example, when a mother
has three kids, it is rarely a question whether or not her third will sleep
through the night early on. The family has learned when to react to a fussy
baby and when to let her soothe herself back to sleep.
Over the years, I’ve come to recommend this somewhat laissez-faire attitude
regarding nighttime behavior as soon as the shock of birth has passed. This
approach is validated by the hundreds of families I see whose babies sleep
effortlessly through the night. These parents never have to resort to the
ugly “let the baby cry it out” approach described below, and many of them
don’t even know they’ve missed out on one of infancy’s most nerve-
wracking problems. As they say: An ounce of prevention . . .
Between Two and Four Months
In 1994, when Tribeca Pediatrics first opened its doors, we recommended that
parents begin sleep-training their babies at around the age of four months.
However, to the universal comfort and sanity of our patients, we have
discovered that sleep-training is even more effective if begun at two months
. Of course, it’s your decision when this process begins and how you choose
to tackle it. But our years of experience, and the testimonials of our well
-rested patients and their parents, have convinced us that this is the most
effective, healthy time to begin sleep-training.
By now, if anna isn’t sleeping through the night, I am sorry to report that
she’s very unlikely to do so on her own. Sooner or later, there’s going
to be a struggle. You probably already sense that although anna eats at
night, she’s less interested in the food than in the soothing experience it
provides.
If you enjoy the cuddling or at least don’t mind the fact that anna wakes
up at night, please skip to the next age group below. If, on the other hand,
you feel sleep-deprived and want to handle the situation, I’ve broken the
process down into three simple steps:
1 | Put anna in her crib at a reasonable hour (while she’s still awake, if
possible). The best time is when both of you have had a chance to interact
with her for a while after work.
2 | After the bath and the songs, kiss her good night.
3 | Come back the next morning at 7:00 A.M.
I have just heard the collective gasp of thousands of parents: “Are you out
of your mind?!” Bear with me. I know this sounds drastic, but it’s the
only way to get anna into the habit of soothing herself rather than relying
on you. It’s true that the first few days she’ll soothe herself to sleep
by crying, but eventually she’ll sleep just like, well, a baby. The first
night she’ll cry two to three times, for twenty to thirty minutes (you’ll
feel like crying too); the second night she’ll cry less; and the third even
less. By the fourth night, you’re home free. Done.
REAL QUESTIONS FROM REAL PARENTS
What if I can’t do it?
Again, if you don’t mind waking up, then you don’t have a problem, and
anna doesn’t either. But as much as I’d like to tell you her sleep
patterns will get better, trust me and trust my experience, they won’t
change on their own.
How long can I let her cry?
Until she falls asleep. It can take an awfully long time. If you last only
twenty minutes, you’re teaching her to cry for twenty minutes before she
gets her soothing.
Can I at least go touch the baby or kiss her, even if I don’t feed her?
If you do, she’ll see it as a tease, become more upset, and cry even longer
because she won’t understand why you won’t feed her. Babies know nothing
of moderation.
How do I know the baby isn’t hungry?
She is hungry. But she does not need to eat. After any three- or four-hour
fasting period, she’ll be hungry. You’re hungry in the middle of the night
, too; it’s just that you learn not to eat because it’s good for your
belly to take a rest. Well, it’s good for hers too.
What about a little water at least?
Only if you want to wake up every couple of hours to give her water.
What about a pacifier?
Same thing.
Would it help if I gave her cereal before bed?
It’s a myth that porridge before bedtime helps a baby sleep, since it will
be digested in the few hours to come. The same goes for topping off a
feeding with a bottle of formula.
Can I feed the baby to sleep?
You can, but it’s better not to. Consistency is important, so why would you
nurse anna to the edge of sleep at 8:00 P.M. but not, say, at 2:00 A.M.? It
’s a habit you’ll have to struggle to overcome, and since you’re doing so
much struggling as it is, you might as well struggle completely and be done
with it. Also, if you’re going to struggle, I assure you that things will
look much more dramatic to you at 2:00 A.M. than they will at 8:00 P.M. And
most of the crying is done early on.
How long will anna sleep at this age?
Ten to twelve hours. Straight.
Without eating?
Without eating.
Can I go to her early in the morning?
Again, if you’re going to struggle, struggle all the way. Babies are
notorious believers in the take-a-mile-if-given-an-inch philosophy. If you
give anna attention at five-thirty, she’ll start looking for you at five.
If you slide back to five, she’ll test you at four. And so forth. Hold to
the schedule, on the other hand, and she’ll learn to put herself back to
sleep in the morning hours.
Aren’t I traumatizing the baby?
At seven in the morning, you’ll be surprised to find a happy, smiling baby
who loves you and loves to see you. And you’ll be rested and happy too.
More to the point, your own smiles during the day won’t be as forced when
you are no longer a zombie.
How about nap time?
Don’t worry about nap time. Once anna learns to sleep at night, daytime
napping will be a breeze.
Is it really this easy?
As I said, after a few days of this, anna will sleep through the night. And
if you wake up, it will only be because you’re surprised that you’re
sleeping so well. But make no mistake: Be prepared for three or four
brutally hard nights. It is never easy to let your baby cry. But once you
start, stick to your guns; if you give in halfway through the process, you’
ll only make it worse.
How do you know all of this?
I learned the hard way. With Abeline, our first daughter, my wife and I took
turns on 2:00 A.M. Lullaby duty. I spent many nights walking around the
loft with Abeline in my arms, singing any French lullaby that my sleep-
starved brain could conjure. I wasn’t sleeping well at home and even less
at work when I was on call. And I was probably just like you, thinking that
if she woke up, she was calling us. At ten months, we were so exhausted from
soothing her that we finally let her cry it out. Within a couple of days
she was sleeping through the night. You’d think we’d have learned our
lesson, but we hadn’t. With our second daughter, Nora, we made the same
mistakes (tending to her every nighttime peep) and later resolved it the
same way. It only took us six months to wise up that time. With Fanny, our
third one, we let her cry herself to sleep early, just like I told you, and
it worked like a charm. She’s a perfectly secure little kid who can fall
asleep fine on her own. By contrast, Abeline, who got the most soothing
before sleeping, still needs her head rubbed every once in a while to get to
sleep, just like in the good old days.
I’ve also learned from the hundreds of sleepless parents to whom I’ve
suggested this method. They initially look at me like I have two heads, but
at the next month’s visit, they show up with broad smiles and tell me, “
That was torture for a few days, but we’re so happy we did it!” | c********g 发帖数: 2075 | 2 我觉得见仁见智,如果父母真的在两三个月后不能忍受再起夜的话可以考虑sleep
train。不过两个月就cry it out闻所未闻,我看的书里说宝宝四到六个月如果不能自
己入睡的话可以考虑CIO. 我家的从三四个月开始规律他的吃奶和睡眠时间,坚决不让
奶睡,从来没用过CIO,现在自己入睡,白天晚上都睡得很好。 | m******t 发帖数: 184 | 3 我也是觉得两个月夸张。他的逻辑是越早越简单,对孩子影响越小。另一个逻辑是,两
个月的孩子,晚上不喝夜奶是okay的。
我觉得这个过程包含两个难题
1。 夜奶问题
2. 孩子睡觉问题,我觉得孩子不需要抱着或吃奶自己睡觉,是非常困难的。我知道的
孩子基本睡觉都需要抱着,哼着哄睡着,再放下,尤其是午睡。不知道你说的孩子自己
睡是否需要抱着,以及这是多大开始的?
【在 c********g 的大作中提到】![](/moin_static193/solenoid/img/up.png) : 我觉得见仁见智,如果父母真的在两三个月后不能忍受再起夜的话可以考虑sleep : train。不过两个月就cry it out闻所未闻,我看的书里说宝宝四到六个月如果不能自 : 己入睡的话可以考虑CIO. 我家的从三四个月开始规律他的吃奶和睡眠时间,坚决不让 : 奶睡,从来没用过CIO,现在自己入睡,白天晚上都睡得很好。
| l*****h 发帖数: 5005 | 4 两个月就sleep train有点太早了吧?不觉得孩子还很小么,CIO挺可怜的,我们是从五
个月开始sleep train的,一开始着实不忍心,也没有完全CIO,循序渐进的时间久了孩
子就自己养成了固定的睡眠规律了 | c********g 发帖数: 2075 | 5 的确是越早开始养成习惯越好,但是太小的宝宝真的很难说有什么习惯。三个月以后可
能比较现实一点。
我说的自己睡是指把宝宝放到crib里自己入睡。我家的自从三四个月开始养成培养规律
的睡眠时间以后入睡就开始慢慢容易了,从一开始的必须奶睡,到戒掉了奶睡,但是必
须要抱着哄,再到抱起来放下去几次然后睡着,再到现在的把他放到crib里他自己扭来
扭去吃手指啃毯子大概十几分钟以后睡着。这个过程大概有两个月,期间还经历了两次
发烧导致睡眠习惯被完全推翻,我们又从头开始。但是我们没用过cry it out的方式,
因为我家的一哭厉害了就吐,我舍不得让他哭太久。
我感觉孩子的睡眠有规律是最重要的,每天定点吃奶和睡觉,吃奶尽量安排在睡醒了30
分钟到一个小时之后,这样宝宝就不会在吃奶的时候睡着。然后在睡觉的点之前半个小
时就开始减低周围的噪音和干扰,抱着哄睡的人不要和宝宝说话,最多就是轻轻地哼歌
或者嘘嘘,或者抱着他看家里的人静静地干活(就是书上说的boring and quiet
environment),让他养成到点就犯困的习惯,之后培养自己入睡的习惯就容易多了。
夜奶在宝宝三四个月戒掉是可能的,但是宝宝的体重必须要达到一定的标准,书上有说
过具体的数字,我不太记得了,两个月就戒夜奶的我没听说过。而且书上说就算6-9个
月的宝宝晚上起来一到两次喝夜奶(6p-6a或者7p-7a之间)都算是正常的,只要父母不
觉得自己的生活被严重影响了就行。9个月以后还需要起夜的话父母可以考虑干预,但
这都是父母自己的选择,我周围朋友一两岁的孩子还起来喝夜奶的都有。
【在 m******t 的大作中提到】![](/moin_static193/solenoid/img/up.png) : 我也是觉得两个月夸张。他的逻辑是越早越简单,对孩子影响越小。另一个逻辑是,两 : 个月的孩子,晚上不喝夜奶是okay的。 : 我觉得这个过程包含两个难题 : 1。 夜奶问题 : 2. 孩子睡觉问题,我觉得孩子不需要抱着或吃奶自己睡觉,是非常困难的。我知道的 : 孩子基本睡觉都需要抱着,哼着哄睡着,再放下,尤其是午睡。不知道你说的孩子自己 : 睡是否需要抱着,以及这是多大开始的?
| m******t 发帖数: 184 | 6 谢谢您的详细分享,我也学习参考一下。
今天两个月检查看了大夫,她说两个月开始孩子不是必须要吃夜奶了,吃夜奶只是她自
己的习惯而已。孩子哭也没有大的问题,只是看大人是否忍心而已。另外和大夫的交流
时她并不推荐什么做法,只是说这样是没问题的。
当然,我发到这里并不是推荐这种做法,只是觉得这是一种方法,而且是听起来比较夸
张的方法。比较好奇是否真的有人这么做么?因为按书上写是建议甚至是“应该”这么
做的。
30
【在 c********g 的大作中提到】![](/moin_static193/solenoid/img/up.png) : 的确是越早开始养成习惯越好,但是太小的宝宝真的很难说有什么习惯。三个月以后可 : 能比较现实一点。 : 我说的自己睡是指把宝宝放到crib里自己入睡。我家的自从三四个月开始养成培养规律 : 的睡眠时间以后入睡就开始慢慢容易了,从一开始的必须奶睡,到戒掉了奶睡,但是必 : 须要抱着哄,再到抱起来放下去几次然后睡着,再到现在的把他放到crib里他自己扭来 : 扭去吃手指啃毯子大概十几分钟以后睡着。这个过程大概有两个月,期间还经历了两次 : 发烧导致睡眠习惯被完全推翻,我们又从头开始。但是我们没用过cry it out的方式, : 因为我家的一哭厉害了就吐,我舍不得让他哭太久。 : 我感觉孩子的睡眠有规律是最重要的,每天定点吃奶和睡觉,吃奶尽量安排在睡醒了30 : 分钟到一个小时之后,这样宝宝就不会在吃奶的时候睡着。然后在睡觉的点之前半个小
| v******s 发帖数: 6949 | 7 Tribeca pediatrics? All of the parents in neighborhood I know did not use
this. | m******t 发帖数: 184 | 8 只能说你那里条件好,这家在我这边是最热门的。因为其他就是社区医院
[在 verithas (夜袭正太村) 的大作中提到:]
:Tribeca pediatrics? All of the parents in neighborhood I know did not use
:this.
:........... |
|